Linus quotes

Linus: I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.

Linus: [writing] Dear Great Pumpkin, I am looking forward to your arrival on Halloween night. I hope you will bring me lots of presents. Everyone tells me you are a fake, but I believe in you. Sincerely, Linus van Pelt. PS - if you really are a fake, don't tell me. I don't want to know.

Linus: There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people...religion, politics and the Great Pumpkin!

Linus: Never jump into a pile of leaves with a wet sucker.

Linus: I don't like to face problems head on. I think the best way to solve problems is to avoid them. This is a distinct philosophy of mine. No problem is so big or so complicated that it can't be run away from!

Linus: Big sisters are the crab grass in the lawn of life.

Lucy: You think being average is enough, don't you? Well it isn't! What shape would the world be in today if everyone settled for being average?
Linus: What shape is the world in today?

Lucy: I've never known anyone who could forget things with such clockwork regularity!
Linus: I guess I'm just mechanically minded!

Linus: Alright, you stupid beagle, I want that blanket back! And I don't mean next month or next week or tomorrow - I want it back today!
Snoopy: What time today?

Linus: Okay, here's the deal. You give me the blanket and I give you the cookie.
Snoopy: Place the cookie on the floor and step back ten paces!

Violet: Did you know that your name is in the New Testament, Linus?
Linus: Yes. In Second Timothy, the fourth chapter and the twenty first verse, "Do your best to come before winter. Eubulus sends greetings to you, as do Pudens and Linus and Claudia and all the brethren."
Violet: You drive me crazy!

Charlie Brown: Do you think you'll be going on any more field trips?
Linus: I doubt it. When you've seen one field, you've seen them all.

[Lucy and Linus argue. Linus goes out and builds a snowman that looks like Lucy.]
Lucy: Ha! I see what you're up to. That's supposed to be me, isn't it? And I'll bet you're going to kick it, aren't you? ...
Linus: On the contrary, that would be crude. I'm going to stand here and watch it slowly melt away!

[Winter. Lucy walks by Linus, who is trying to look innocent.]
Lucy: If you hit me with that snowball, you're going to be sorry! [She walks on. And gets hit.]
Linus: Oh I'm sorry! You're right - I'm very sorry! I hit my own sister with a snowball and now I'm really sorry - I'm so sorry! You were really right! How did you know I'd be so sorry? I'm really sorry! [He gets slogged.] How sorry can you get?